When follow-up backfires

By Jeff Altman, Big Game Hunter

EP 3126 Sometimes, your desire to follow up can backfire.

LinkedIn’s #opentowork post

You know the feeling. When you come out of the interview, you’re just floating. You think, I definitely did it.

You are excited. You are very confident. You can already see yourself drinking coffee in the lounge.

But then the wait begins. And that waiting game, wow. This can be one of the most nerve-wracking parts of the entire job search process.

That’s what’s bothering you, right? You feel a real connection. Great conversation. You have the perfect answer for everything.

So why is your inbox turning into a ghost town? It’s very frustrating and, honestly, a little confusing. So let’s take a look at what can actually happen during silence and how our best intentions can sometimes backfire completely. OK

First, let’s talk about what happens to you in the quiet time after the interview. It’s been a real emotional rollercoaster. If you can understand this process, you can avoid making a very common mistake.

I mean, does this timeline look familiar? On day one, you’re on top of the world. You feel hopeful. You feel good.

By day three, however, that little seed of doubt began to spread. By day five, gosh, this anxiety had developed into this powerful temptation, the urge to follow through again. That’s when a lot of us screw up.

This brings us to a problem we call the “follow-up fallacy.” Even the best, most enthusiastic candidates can fall into this trap when post-interview anxiety takes over. The source material really plays no role here.

It says that when you follow up multiple times in just a few days, you can appear impatient and demanding. Let’s talk about those two words first because they are very powerful, but not in a good way. So what exactly is this fallacy? Well, it’s a mistaken belief that sending more emails or making more phone calls is a good way to show how interested you are.

You thought you were screaming, I am passionate, I am dedicated. But what they actually heard was something else entirely. And this is the heart of the matter.

It’s a huge gap between what you want to convey and how they actually perceive it. What you were trying to say was completely lost in translation. I mean, look at this.

It illustrates this disconnect perfectly. On your part, your intention is to show your desire, your enthusiasm, your initiative, all of which are great things. But from the hiring manager’s perspective, you seem impatient, demanding, and maybe even lacking a bit of professional judgment.

This is a complete communication failure. Let’s dig into the first word: impatience. Look, the recruiting team is dealing with a ton of stuff.

Other candidates, meetings, their own projects. To them, your constant check-ins don’t really translate as desire. They think you can’t respect their processes and timelines.

A little strategic patience, which shows confidence. And then you have the second word, demand. You might think you’re just asking for a quick update, but from their perspective, it might feel like you’re taking up their time.

Think about it, before you even join the team, people may think you are already difficult to manage. Okay, so if this doesn’t send the message you want it to, what is the actual result? Well, unfortunately, that’s pretty much the exact opposite of what you were hoping for. The sources are very clear on this point.

This strategy won’t get you the results you want. Therefore, all the energy and anxiety you pour into your follow-up actions are actually working against your primary goal, which is to get the job offer. If you think about it, this is a very simple chain reaction.

Step one, send multiple follow-up messages. In the second step, this behavior directly causes them to form a negative impression of you, thinking that you are impatient and too demanding. The final, devastating step is to not only not get the job, but to actively turn it down.

The source uses a very strong word here: ostracism. It’s not just a neutral thing about them choosing other people. Your behavior does cause disgust.

You’re pushing opportunities away from you, like you’re being pulled in the wrong direction by a magnet. Now that we’ve walked past this all-too-common pitfall, what’s the most important thing you need to remember? In fact, it boils down to these three things. First, and this is important, your good intentions do not mean they will be perceived in a good way.

Secondly, with those frequent follow-ups, they may inadvertently send out some really negative signals. On top of that, all of these things can actively take away the opportunities you’ve worked so hard for. This leaves us with one final question for you to think carefully about during your own job search.

The next time you feel post-interview anxiety creeping in and your hands hover over the keyboard to type another follow-up, stop and ask yourself, will my desire actually help me get an opportunity here, or will I miss this opportunity?

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About Big Game Hunter Jeff Altman

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